enough with all the bull crap

unable to lift what has been damaged...

i picked up all the pices... but still haven't tried to put them back together. I mean slowly but surely i think it will come together. but I'm not so sure about that. Its hard as it is...


so... humm...

my feelings right now: i feel very stressed out. I've thrown down the safe gaurd and i'm putting on my boxing gloves. ITs time for the bitch in me to come out... and well... it has yet to begin. WATCH YOURSELF. This is going to be a a big on..... and i might have to put myself on blast. megaphone. NO NEED.

anyways... I might be on the verge of a total break down with being so overwhelmed with everything. I wish there was that shoulder that i could cry on. That someone who i can tell everything to and not have to worrie about whats going to happen. I wish i had that again. I feel so helpless.

It doesnt help at the fact that I think he hates me.



DAMN FUCK... SHIT!!!! ERRRRRR....... YOU MAKE ME SO ANGRY! I HATE YOU... I HATE THIS.. I HATE...

WHY AM I STILL HERE.... WHY?
WHY DO I STILL CARE?
am i still heart broken?
am I jealious?

is it that....

FUCK YOU AND YOU AND YOU AND OH YEAH YOU!!!!

I HATE YOU!

about 3 or soo weeks left then this madness will be fuckin over and you'll never have to see me ever again.

I just want to break down and cry with you holding me in your arms...

DAMN... those times... damn those memories... DAMN IT!

"6,8,12"Ooh, oohDo you ever think about me?Do you ever cry yourself to sleep?In the middle of the night when you're awake,Are you calling out for me?Do you ever reminisce?I can't believe I'm acting like thisI know it's crazyHow I still can feel your kiss[1] - It's been six months, eight days, twelve hours Since you went away I miss you so much and I don't know what to sayI should be over youI should know better but it's just not the case It's been six months, eight days, twelve hours Since you went away Do you ever ask about me?Do your friends still tell you what to do?Every time the phone rings,Do you wish it was me calling you?Do you still feel the same?Or has time put out the flame?I miss you Is everything okay?[Repeat 1]It's hard enough just passing the timeWhen I can't seem to get you off my mindAnd where is the good in goodbye?Tell me why, tell me why[Repeat 1]Sing it for meOoh, ooh

All i wanted was to work things out but you never gave it a chance.

BLAH...

I MISS YOU!!!!..... and still love you